Why I Count Exits: How Policy Choices Become Biology
From a Former Free Lunch Kid
I'm writing this from a café in Palo Alto, one of the wealthiest zip codes in America. I've been here for thirty minutes, and I've already identified three exit routes, assessed which customers might be threats, and positioned myself with my back to the wall facing the entrance.
This isn't paranoia. This is policy.
This is what happens when America's systematic abandonment of proven investment strategies rewires a developing nervous system. This is how childhood trauma literally changes brain architecture in ways that persist decades later. This is the biological cost of the $40 trillion policy mistake I survived—and documented.
Twenty years after escaping poverty, I still can't walk into a room without mapping escape routes. That fact tells a story about American policy failure that business leaders and policymakers desperately need to understand.
The Neurobiology of Policy Abandonment
The hypervigilance that keeps me scanning for threats in a suburban coffee shop was developed navigating San Francisco's Mission District during the crack epidemic of the 1980s. This wasn't just a drug problem. It was a policy-created disaster that exposed an entire generation of children to chronic violence and systematic abandonment.
Research on toxic stress shows that chronic exposure to adversity during critical developmental periods creates measurable changes in brain architecture that affect learning, memory, emotional regulation, and stress response throughout life. The Centers for Disease Control documents that children experiencing multiple adverse childhood experiences (ACEs) show alterations in the hippocampus, amygdala, and prefrontal cortex that affect their ability to form relationships, manage emotions, and make decisions as adults.
This isn't metaphorical. This is measurable, biological fact.
The crack epidemic that defined my childhood was the predictable result of specific policy choices. Federal policies had systematically defunded community mental health services, job training programs, and drug treatment while dramatically increasing funding for police and prisons. The War on Drugs created mass incarceration while doing little to address the underlying causes of addiction.
Between 1984 and 1989, homicide rates for Black males aged 14 to 17 more than doubled. The Black community experienced a 20-100% increase in fetal death rates, low birth-weight babies, weapons arrests, and children in foster care. Children across Bay Area neighborhoods witnessed the predictable results of policy abandonment, and our developing nervous systems were adapting to survive environments that adults had created through political decisions.
The Hidden Curriculum of Systematic Abandonment
While my classmates in wealthy districts were learning math and reading, I was learning a different curriculum entirely—one that America's policy choices had made necessary for survival:
Threat Assessment 101: How to read facial expressions to predict whether laughter might turn violent. How to identify which adults were safe and which were dangerous. How to position myself near exits and scan constantly for escape routes.
Resource Scarcity Management: How to make $20 last two weeks. How to distinguish between wants and needs. How to find nutrition in government surplus commodities designed more for shelf stability than child development.
Cultural Code-Switching: How to speak "standard English" at school while maintaining connections to family and community. How to hide markers of poverty to avoid stigma while retaining authentic identity.
Emotional Regulation Under Chaos: Maintaining academic focus while experiencing housing instability. How to concentrate on homework while listening to my parents talk about a family member’s domestic violence through thin walls. How to hope for the future while watching addiction destroy my family members. Having ADHD and not knowing at all.
This was my education. Not supplementary to math and reading, but often instead of them.
The Biological Cost of Policy Failure
The most devastating aspect isn't what happened to me at all. It's what happened to my entire generation, and how those biological changes now affect our children. Research shows that adults who experienced childhood trauma maintain elevated baseline stress hormones that create chronic inflammation and increased cardiovascular disease, diabetes, and autoimmune disorder risks.
The food insecurity I experienced created lasting changes in metabolism and eating behaviors that persist even when adequate nutrition becomes available. Housing instability created what researchers call "place attachment disorder"—difficulty forming emotional connections to physical spaces and persistent anxiety about housing and job security (hello, recent layoff).
But here's the intergenerational impact that should terrify every business leader: these biological changes don't end with us. The educational and health outcomes achieved by one generation significantly predict the outcomes of the next generation, creating cycles that persist across multiple generations.
And now my children's generation faces a threat mine never did: school shootings.
Since Columbine in 1999, more than 390,000 students have been exposed to school shootings. The rate of student exposure has increased threefold—from 19 per 100,000 students in 1999-2004 to 51 per 100,000 in 2020-2024. Research from Northwestern University shows that youth antidepressant use increases by over 25% in areas following fatal school shootings, with prescription spikes lasting for years.
My children practice lockdown drills the way I practiced fire drills. They learn to huddle silently in corners, to barricade doors, to identify escape routes—the same hypervigilance skills I developed from poverty and violence, now systematically taught to an entire generation through "safety" protocols. Even schools without shootings report that active shooter drills cause psychological harm to participants.
The cruel irony is unmistakable: I spent decades in therapy learning that the world was safe enough to stop counting exits, only to watch my children's schools teach them the same survival skills that took me years to unlearn.
The True Cost of Zip Code Biology
The café where I'm writing is less than fifty miles from where I grew up, but it might as well be a different planet. The children here grow up learning different lessons entirely. They learn that adults are generally trustworthy and institutions exist to protect them. They learn that resources are abundant and their needs will be met. They learn that the future is something to plan for rather than fear.
Their developing nervous systems are learning patterns of security, abundance, and possibility that become the biological foundation for different life outcomes.
This isn't about individual families or personal choices. This is about zip code determining biology. This is about policy choices creating different developmental environments for children based on their parents' income.
Post-Traumatic Growth: The Silver Lining with Receipts
Here's what's fascinating from a business perspective: those same biological adaptations also created capabilities that money can't buy. Research on post-traumatic growth shows that adversity can develop sophisticated emotional intelligence, enhanced problem-solving abilities, and powerful motivation for preventing others from experiencing similar harm.
The threat assessment skills make me an exceptional leader who can read rooms and anticipate problems. The resourcefulness translates into creativity and innovation under pressure. The emotional regulation abilities help me support others in crisis. The trauma responses that created challenges also created competitive advantages.
I'm now one of 2% of Latinas in tech leadership, generating millions in tax revenue and building company brands across 20+ years. That hypervigilance that scans for exits also scans for market opportunities, competitive threats, and organizational dysfunction before others notice them.
The Business Case for Biological Justice
Understanding how policy choices become biology changes everything about how we should think about community investment, workforce development, and economic strategy.
When governments invest in school meals, they're not just feeding children—they're preventing metabolic dysfunction that affects health and productivity for decades. When they fund quality education, they're not just improving test scores—they're creating neural pathways that support learning and emotional regulation throughout working careers. When they provide stable housing assistance, they're not just addressing homelessness—they're enabling secure attachment formation that affects relationship and leadership capacity for generations.
This isn't charity. This is workforce development. This is economic development. This is competitive advantage through human capital optimization.
The ROI of Systematic Solutions
Every time I count exits in a safe space, I'm reminded that we have the data to prevent this biological scarring for future generations. The research is clear, the interventions are proven, and the economic case is overwhelming:
School lunch programs increase lifetime income by 3% per child exposed—generating massive tax revenue returns
Early childhood interventions return $7 for every dollar invested in reduced healthcare costs and increased productivity
Housing stability programs improve educational outcomes and reduce intergenerational trauma transmission
Community mental health investment prevents the cascade of biological changes that create permanent disadvantages
The question isn't whether we can afford to invest in children's biological development. The question is whether we can afford the ongoing costs of systematic abandonment.
The Exit Strategy Worth Fighting For
I'll keep counting exits until every child in America has the safety and security that should be their birthright. But I dream of a generation that never needs to learn hypervigilance skills because they grow up in a society that finally understands the connection between policy choices and childhood biology.
What if American children didn't have to develop trauma-based adaptations to survive childhood? What if they could develop the same resourcefulness, creativity, and emotional intelligence through opportunity rather than adversity? What if we invested in creating the conditions for healthy brain development instead of managing the consequences of systematic abandonment?
As someone who survived policy failure and built a career proving what works, I can tell you with confidence: we have the roadmap back to biological justice. We have the economic analysis. We have the intervention strategies. We have the proof of concept.
What we need is the leadership to choose systematic investment over systematic abandonment.
That's the exit strategy worth fighting for—not just for individuals to escape failed systems, but for America to exit the expensive cycle of creating trauma and return to the prosperity-building policies that generate healthy communities, strong workforces, and economic competitive advantage.
The biology is clear. The economics are overwhelming. The choice is ours.
Sources
Adverse Childhood Experiences Research: Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. "About Adverse Childhood Experiences." https://www.cdc.gov/aces/about/index.html
Toxic Stress and Brain Development: Shonkoff, J.P., et al. "The lifelong effects of early childhood adversity and toxic stress." Pediatrics, 129(1), e232–e246. https://doi.org/10.1542/peds.2011-2663
ACEs and Adult Health Outcomes: Cleveland Clinic. "Understanding Childhood Trauma & Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACEs)." https://my.clevelandclinic.org/health/symptoms/24875-adverse-childhood-experiences-ace
Crack Epidemic Policy Analysis: Brennan Center for Justice. "Race, Mass Incarceration, and the Disastrous War on Drugs." https://www.brennancenter.org/our-work/analysis-opinion/race-mass-incarceration-and-disastrous-war-drugs
War on Drugs Impact on Communities: PBS NewsHour. "50-year war on drugs imprisoned millions of Black Americans." https://www.pbs.org/newshour/nation/50-year-war-on-drugs-imprisoned-millions-of-black-americans
Crack Epidemic Statistics: Encyclopedia Britannica. "Crack epidemic." https://www.britannica.com/topic/crack-epidemic
Post-Traumatic Growth Research: Psychology Today. "Post-Traumatic Growth." https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/basics/post-traumatic-growth
Post-Traumatic Growth and Childhood Trauma: Blackie, L.E.R., et al. "The relationship between childhood trauma and post-traumatic growth." Social Sciences, 13(5), 262. https://www.mdpi.com/2076-0760/13/5/262
Brain Architecture and Adversity: Harvard University Center on the Developing Child. "Toxic Stress." https://developingchild.harvard.edu/science/key-concepts/toxic-stress/
School Shooting Impact Research: Northwestern University Institute for Policy Research. "The Mental Health Effects of School Shootings." https://www.ipr.northwestern.edu/news/2024/the-mental-health-effects-of-school-shootings.html
Student Exposure Statistics: KFF Analysis. "Examining School Shootings at the National and State Level and Mental Health Implications." https://www.kff.org/mental-health/issue-brief/examining-school-shootings-at-the-national-and-state-level-and-mental-health-implications/
Mental Health Outcomes from Gun Violence: PMC Review. "Reviewing the Literature on the Impact of Gun Violence on Early Childhood Development." https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC10213564/
Long-term Effects of School Shootings: Stanford SIEPR. "Surviving a school shooting: Impacts on the mental health, education, and earnings of American youth." https://siepr.stanford.edu/publications/health/surviving-school-shooting-impacts-mental-health-education-and-earnings-american